Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Something Fun for Your Tuesday. . .

I came across these lists online and thought they were kind of funny (and true in some regards) so I thought I would share them with you.

May I present to you 20 Reasons Why It's Great to Be a Guy and 20 Reasons Why It's Great to Be a Woman. . .followed by some differences between guys and girls. :)

20 Reasons Why It's Great to be a Guy
  1. Phone conversations are over in 60 seconds flat.
  2. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter.
  3. You can go to the bathroom without a support group.
  4. You needn't pretend you're "freshening up" to go to the bathroom.
  5. You can open all your own jars.
  6. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
  7. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
  8. Your last name stays put.
  9. You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes.
  10. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.
  11. You don't have to shave below your neck.
  12. You can watch a game in silence with your buddy for hours without even thinking "He must be mad at me"
  13. Gray hair and wrinkles add character.
  14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
  15. The remote is yours and yours alone.
  16. You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a little gift.
  17. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you might become lifelong buddies.
  18. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So... notice anything different?"
  19. You don't have to remember everyone's birthdays and anniversaries.
  20. You think the idea of punting a small dog is funny.

20 Reasons Why It's Great to be a Woman 
  1. You get out of speeding tickets by crying
  2. You can marry rich and then not have to work
  3. Your conversations generally consist of more than just "uh huh, yep, ok, then bye"
  4. You never have to pay when you go out on dates
  5. You pout better (those puppy dog eyes always work!)
  6. You always have food in the fridge
  7. You don't worry about losing your hair
  8. You get candy, flowers and jewelery all the time cuz men mess up so often
  9. The remote control is not an extension of yourself
  10. You are cleaner
  11. You get better tips
  12. You have mastered civilized eating - You don't embarass your friends or make loud bodily noises in public
  13. You don’t have excessive amounts of body hair
  14. You smell better
  15. You are less likely to be a serial killers, thief, or rapists…
  16. …and if you are, you do less time for violent crime
  17. You dont get the humor in the Three Stooges
  18. You have better fashion sense
  19. When women are short, your petite, when men are short… they're just short
  20. An ugly woman can use makeup and get a new hairdo to become presentable - ugly men… are just ugly

Men and Women Compared   
-         Eating Out
When the bill arrives, Mike, Charlie, Bob and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $22.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
-         Money
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want.
-         Toiletries
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.
-         Arguments
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
-         Future
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
-         Success
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
-         Marriage
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.
-         Dressing
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings, funerals.
-         Looks
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
-         Cats
Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

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